Some of Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations, applied to our
Commander-in-Chief:
Maybe he'll get stuck down therre
“A foolish consistency
is the hobgoblin of little minds.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson. And we all know, because
he constantly reminds us, that Donald Trump’s mind isn’t little. It’s yuge! He knows more than the generals
about the military; he knows more than anyone in the world about taxes, about
banking, about money, about “the system,” about trade, about infrastructure,
about “the horrors of nuclear.” Also about changing his mind.
“Stone walls do not a
prison make…” – Richard Lovelace. That’s why we have to have more actual
prisons, and why Mr. Prez Trump enthusiastically supports private prisons,
whose stock has been soaring since candidate Trump endorsed them during his
campaign. The federal prison population has been steadily falling over the last
several years, even though the U. S. still leads the world. If we’re going to
make America great again, we’ve got to stuff our prisons to the max, and make
sure that the incarcerated stay put, something that’s more easily facilitated when
stockholders’ profit and loss are involved.
“Golf is a good walk
spoiled.”—Mark Twain. But it’s a nice ride, for Trump, unlike the ride he’s
giving us, the humble taxpayers. Each Trumpian golf vacation to Mar-a-Lago
costs us about $3.6 million; so far Trump has taken 14 of them. But let’s not
begrudge our beleaguered leader a little time away from the worries of the
Office. I say we encourage him to play golf every day, and let someone else
take a swing at running the country.
“Nothing is certain
except death and taxes.” – Ben Franklin. Trump has proven half the adage
wrong: what could be more uncertain than a Trump tax disclosure?
“Russia is a riddle
wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.” – Winston Churchill. You could say
that about Trump’s Russian relations. Was his affair with Putin a dalliance or
a full-blown bromance? What was Russia’s motivation for interfering in the
Presidential election? And how much does it cost to have a Russian whore pee on
a bed?
“All children are
essentially criminal.” – Denis Diderot. President Trump’s grown sons, Eric
and Don Jr. (Weasel and Slinky), are now at the helm of their father’s business
empire. Eric has visited the Dominican Republic to oversee a project, despite
the Trumpster’s pledge to undertake no new overseas deals, and also to Uruguay,
a trip which cost taxpayers about $100,000. The kids’ old man has refused to
divest himself of his assets, while pledging that everything will be on the
up-and-up.
“Truth is stranger than
fiction.” – Lord Byron. President Trump has taken this old saw to heart,
resolving to stick to fiction whenever possible.
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